Okay, the really amazing thing about this is it could easily be sung by either of them to the other, except that they probably never would because they don’t think they really deserve the other’s forgiveness or to be happy ;~; fuck there are all my feelings again
“Q: So when I don’t know how a person identifies, I should always ask?
A: The Easy Answer is “yes,” but I’m not going to give you that one right now, because I think you can handle the Real Answer. The Real Answer is that in a lot of situations, the most respectful thing you can do is not need to ask.
Outside of Queer World, we know a lot about people just because they fit the same story that we’re telling. If Jane gets pregnant, we can assume it was from her husband, and if it wasn’t there’s probably a scandal to gossip about. If we meet a man named John in a suit at a party, we can usually assume that John has a penis and that he likes girls with vaginas. There’s nothing wrong with these assumptions when everyone fits the story. They stop being okay, though, when some people don’t.
Inside Queer World, we try to stop assuming. We still do it (a lot — call it human nature), but we try to remember that the stories we’re making up about people are just stories, and we try very hard not to say them out loud until they’re confirmed. The most respectful way to get someone’s real story is to listen, not to ask. If you meet someone new, and you can’t tell what their gender, sexuality, or relationship story is is right away, ask yourself how much it really matters right that moment to know the truth. Find a way to sit with the idea that maybe, this identity is a personal matter that they don’t want to talk about right then. Find a way to be okay with that. We don’t get all of these answers from each other, either, and we’re okay with that.
Then again, if it’s genuinely relevant, or if the person in question is ready and willing to field questions, go ahead and ask. Just be prepared to accept whatever they tell you, even if it doesn’t quite make sense to you, and be very respectful about it all.”—Sarah Dopp, from her Frequently Asked Questions about Gender and Sexuality in Doppland. I think this goes beyond non-normative gender presentations, but also in regards to anything queer or just non-normative (like hairstyles) or general uncomfortable/unusual situations. (via bespangled)
let’s call it what it really is: often ableism, often classism, and always policing people’s speech when it’s harmless.
I object to being called ableist and classist when it’s…
nobody wants to be harassed about how they write
haha “i object to being called ableist and classist when i’m engaging in behavior that is ableist and classist because i am a magical being that knows everyone’s situation ever and deserves to harass people about this.”
have fun with that
when people are like IT MAKES ME SO MAD THAT PEOPLE DON’T USE ENGLISH THE WAY IT SAYS IN THIS HERE GRAMMAR/SPELLING BOOK. i think, wow your life must be so hard because you follow those rules. no one follows the rules!
even english doesn’t follow the actual rules
i mean the only time you can really say english must follow the rules is when it’s academia
but hey!! you know what’s classist and ableist????? ding ding ding!! YOU GUESSED IT!!! ACADEMIA!!!!
so you know what. basically, if your intended audience understands what you are saying? GOOD JOB. otherwise, screw what everyone else says about how you “should” say it.
yesssss everything softie said though i would add that in addition to ableism and classism, it can also be an issue of racism too for many people who don’t have english as their first language
basically the point is that people need to quit being jerks about grammar but that was the original subject line wasn’t it
“1. You are human. You are worthy of respect. You deserve to be treated with the same dignity as anyone else. There is nothing inherently wrong with your gender. You are not broken, you are not disgusting, you do not deserve to be hurt. […]”
I used to get annoyed at my cat for always biting and chewing on and pulling my hair when it’s wet and then I googled it and google told me that it’s because my cat loves me and thinks I’m a sweet-but-dopey, gigantic, mostly-hairless cat so he’s grooming me to protect me from the horror of having wet fur.
I don’t know if any of that is even remotely true but I don’t even have the heart to stop him from doing it anymore. OH CAT, I LOVE YOU TOO. ;___;
i have been WAITING for him to do something like that anyway, i want him to be working with s.w.o.r.d. to set up alternative shelters for the x-kids because he might’ve left utopia behind but he would never abandon its people
yesssssssssssss omg he should totally do that
aaaaaah that would be so awesome
HANK GO DO THIS NOW NOW NOW
best idea ever
ALL I’M SAYING IS HE’D BE LOOKING FOR SOLUTIONS AND ALTERNATIVES if the x-books weren’t so busy treating scott like he’s right and there’s no other way to do things then something like this would totally be happening
yeah, not as big a fan of ellis’ run.kitty was a little off, but i thought the antagonism towards emma was kind of fitting, but overdone.i don’t like kitty/peter either,but i did like the scene when colossus was brought back, so idk.ty for this tho:)
maybe that scene itself was plotted out okay but ugh i wish they could’ve just left him dead
But the thing about her antagonism to Emma, aside from the fact that it made the most prominent f/f relationship in the run a negative one without any real positive ones to pick up the slack, I just couldn’t really buy it! There’s the line where she says that Emma has always been ~the face of evil~ for her, and that’s just completely ridiculous!
I mean, sure, she was the first villain Emma ever encountered, but the most memorable? Am I missing something here, because Kitty has run into a million huge and horrible villains throughout her life that Emma pales in comparison to on the evil scale.
Also, is there something between Generation X and New X-Men that I’m missing where Emma suddenly decided that she’s going to be the most villainous villain and try to take over the world or something? Because ever since Morrison brought her into the main team, they’ve treated her not-being-a-villain like it’s been a recent development and they didn’t give her and Sean their own group of students in Massachusetts years ago. Idk, it gets kinda old.
so i know that you aren't a fan of astonishing x-men.
i don't think i've seen you post about why this is? (i may be wrong i don't backread compulsively)
but i was just kind of interested as to why you don't like it.
not that i think you should change your opinion, and i certainly don't expect a ten page essay on why you don't like it.
ughhhhh where do i even start
Whedon’s Kitty was the absolute worst and not-at-all like Kitty. The sudden antagonism towards Emma was out of the blue and really grating. And he was pretty awful towards Emma all throughout the run! Every time something happened where it was supposed to look like Kitty’d one-upped Emma, I always just thought she was being more of a jerk than a hero. I was really disappointed that so many of those moments got nominated (and voted for!) on Girls Read Comics Too’s Marvel Women poll.
Also, I anti-ship Kitty/Piotr, especially due to the gross way Whedon restored it, with the way he handled Kitty in an infantilizing and fetishistic manner. It’s just ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh.
Then there’s the way Scott’s the only one the story doesn’t treat pretty badly, when AXM isn’t all about Whedon creeping on Kitty, it’s making Scott look cool. And you know I don’t give a shit about Scott. And Logan was the same joke over and over and it got so incredibly old.
Also, I hated John Cassaday’s design for Hank. I got pretty bored with Cassaday’s art in general.
So yeah, I basically hated everything about it! Except that it gave us Abigail Brand, Kavita Rao, and Hisako Ichiki, I’m glad the x-mythos has them. Everything else was No Good.
also warren ellis’ run was more than a little racist
Do Babs! I got as far as Xatu and/or Medicham and gave up due to lack of sufficient Pokemon nerdery, I'm curious as to your thoughts on an actual team.
Ohhhh, I will have to think about this one!
Gonna be a little delayed since my Alex app was just accepted, so I’m working on bringing him into the game before I go to bed, but if you find me a good backdrop then I’ll try to work on it in the morning!